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Categories: I’ve been collecting signatures on a petition for the Ohio Rights Group to get medicinal marijuana on the ballot this November. Since 87% of Ohioans support medical marijuana, if we can get it on the ballot, it’ll be easy to get passed. Earlier this week, Ohio held their primary elections, so knowing there would be a lot of registered voters out, I went to a polling location & stood there with my petition all day. Fortunately, about 30 minutes after I showed up, an older gentleman (named Dave) showed up to get signatures for a petition to support the Voters Bill of Rights (which I gladly signed, as voting hours have recently been restricted in Ohio). He had a table, so we helped each other get signatures on our petitions and joked around to help pass the time. He was a really cool dude and it made collecting signatures (and getting rejected by people) a lot more fun. Toward the end of the day, an older guy walked toward us and I asked if he’d sign my petition. He thought for a moment and said, “No, I don’t think so.” I replied, “Alright, that’s fine.” Dave then asked, “Well, will you sign a petition for the Voters Bill of Rights?” and explained it some. The man interrupted him and said, “No, I don’t support that at all,” and started walking away. That would have been that, except then he added, “If your petition was to only allow property owners and tax payers to vote, I would sign that.” I immediately blurted out, “Wow, fuck you, dude, you’re trash.” He grumbled something about how he “pays for everything” and how he’s sick of “moochers,” and I just continued to reiterate “Wow, you are an absolutely disgusting piece of trash.” until he got in his car and drove off. I obviously didn’t change that dude’s mind, but at the very least, he probably drove home, grumbling about “moochers” & loud-mouthed women who don’t know their place. And I’m happy with that. Sorry dude, you don’t just get to say things like that in public with no consequence (even if the only consequence is me calling you trash). Some people think I overreacted. “He just had a different opinion than you and you need to respect that! Everyone gets to have their own opinion in America!” Well, except, not really. Sure, this guy was civil. He didn’t swear, he didn’t attack either of us physically, he didn’t raise his voice…so why did I break social norms and curse him out in public? Because he wants to take away the fundamental rights of people he doesn’t like. I can curse at this guy until I’m blue in the face, and the worst case is that I might annoy him. Seriously, that’s it. I was half his size, so it’s not like I was threatening or intimidating to him in any way. Swearing at him doesn’t take away any of his human rights. And I don’t want to take away any of his rights. I wanted him to stop saying offensive things, sure, but I didn’t actually stop him from talking (I just talked louder than him while he was in my vicinity). It appalls me that there are people who value civility more than respect. Being civil doesn’t mean you’re being nice or decent or respectful, and we need to dispel the notion that civility does mean those things. For another example, let’s look at marriage equality. “The FAMiLY LEADER” is an Iowa-based organization dedicated to promoting Christian values (I had the privilege of arguing with their leader, Bob Vander Plaats, when I went to college in Iowa). On their website, they say their stance on sexuality is: “The Family Leader affirms sexual relations within the bond of marriage, and opposes distortions of sexuality or special rights to those practicing distorted sexual behavior.” They’re couching bigoted and hateful language in polite, “civil” language. The fact that most people would ever consider what they say to be more socially acceptable than, “Fuck you, you’re a bigot who wants to take away fundamental rights from other human beings,” is appalling to me. Now before I get a thousand comments telling me “well you need to be civil sometimes!,” I’d like to say that, yes, I do understand the need for civility in many situations. I’m not suggesting you start cursing out your boss if you disagree with them. I’m not saying you should curse out cashiers at the grocery store (actually, you should never do that). I’m not even saying you should use harsh language if you don’t want to, or even in most situations. What I am saying is this: suggesting that some people don’t deserve the same basic rights as you is inherently uncivil, and if I respond with cursing or any other form of “bad language,” I am not the one who “crossed the line” first, you did. No one ever got their rights by being civil and nice to their oppressors. I refuse to play civility politics, and you should too. | |
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Fuck your Civility Bullshit
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